I lost my husband to ALS 2 months ago. I still wear my rings, but I am thinking of switching them to my right hand. I love the idea of a widow's ring with additional stones to represent the kids (mine are 10 and 14). Maybe in the future. Thank you and much love to you.
I’m so sorry for your loss. Bless you. I know the feelings of woverwhelm, exhaustion, and grief you’re feeling now.
I like that I can remove it for kneading bread or gardening, but my right hand does feel empty without it. I have finally adjusted to not having my wedding rings on. It took nearly a year for that to seem normal, and I didn’t take them off until they were making the ring.
What a great idea you had here, Celia. It can be quite the challenge to know what to do with one's wedding ring after your spouse has died (which happened to me too). In fact I wrote about my ring, but it's quite different to yours! Here's the link in case you're interested https://janeduncanrogers.substack.com/p/marrying-yourself-after-becoming
I love this Jane! What a great ritual. I wanted to transform our wedding rings and incorporate the jewelry from his family, not worth much but so important as a part of his journey. I think I always carried my grandmother’s choice to transform her ring in my memories. Especially since I buried his ashes in his home country, I wanted a marker with me. But also one that was neither a wedding ring nor a mourning ring.
Late to this one but I love the ring and the thoughts behind it. I also, though, wanted to say that when my parents made my brother retake his A levels despite his being totally unacademic, and he failed again - his hands swelled up.
I have never heard of this happening to anyone else. Kind of reassuring.
I had to have a bunch of tests to rule out anything serious, and then the super diagnostician I eventually saw about it assured me that while it’s not a common reaction, it’s also not particularly uncommon. Some of us just react this way to extreme stress. The annoying part is once it has happened, it’s far more likely to happen again, as it has for me several times (and basically continuously since Dave’s 2020 diagnosis).
It is. Mine first happened when I was coming to terms with leaving academia, feeling powerless and out of control. There’s a lot of new research the past 20 years or so on physiological responses to stress. It’s so very complex.
What a beautiful ring and wonderful memory to share with your boys.
I had Dana’s Goldsmithing create a custom ring for me from my engagement and wedding rings and my mom’s eternity ring when she passed away. I love it and it is something I will always treasure. Our 9 month old granddaughter is always touching it ❤️
They do extraordinary work, don’t they? I feel fortunate that my neighbour’s recommended them. And yes, it’s a lovely memory to share with my boys as well.
What a beautiful story. Thank you for sharing. I'm going to investigate this with the jewelry I have my grandmother and mother. ( I sold my wedding and engagement ring after my horric divorce and that felt good).
It's a wonderful process (as well as end result) - I highly recommend it! I love how it feels too - like I'm honouring what we had, but also acknowledging that our marriage ended in his death. I wouldn't want to wear stones I associated with a horrific divorce anymore than I'd want to wear stones that were mined unethically. I agree, much better to sell them.
What a moving story. I love the care and thoughtfulness you put into choosing your new ring. And to include your children in it makes it all the more special. Also, I LOVE both those shows too!
Thanks Lisa! It does feel so special to wear. I’m a little sad that both series are done for the season, but I certainly enjoyed them while they lasted!
I lost my husband to ALS 2 months ago. I still wear my rings, but I am thinking of switching them to my right hand. I love the idea of a widow's ring with additional stones to represent the kids (mine are 10 and 14). Maybe in the future. Thank you and much love to you.
I’m so sorry for your loss. Bless you. I know the feelings of woverwhelm, exhaustion, and grief you’re feeling now.
I like that I can remove it for kneading bread or gardening, but my right hand does feel empty without it. I have finally adjusted to not having my wedding rings on. It took nearly a year for that to seem normal, and I didn’t take them off until they were making the ring.
What a great idea you had here, Celia. It can be quite the challenge to know what to do with one's wedding ring after your spouse has died (which happened to me too). In fact I wrote about my ring, but it's quite different to yours! Here's the link in case you're interested https://janeduncanrogers.substack.com/p/marrying-yourself-after-becoming
I love this Jane! What a great ritual. I wanted to transform our wedding rings and incorporate the jewelry from his family, not worth much but so important as a part of his journey. I think I always carried my grandmother’s choice to transform her ring in my memories. Especially since I buried his ashes in his home country, I wanted a marker with me. But also one that was neither a wedding ring nor a mourning ring.
Late to this one but I love the ring and the thoughts behind it. I also, though, wanted to say that when my parents made my brother retake his A levels despite his being totally unacademic, and he failed again - his hands swelled up.
I have never heard of this happening to anyone else. Kind of reassuring.
I had to have a bunch of tests to rule out anything serious, and then the super diagnostician I eventually saw about it assured me that while it’s not a common reaction, it’s also not particularly uncommon. Some of us just react this way to extreme stress. The annoying part is once it has happened, it’s far more likely to happen again, as it has for me several times (and basically continuously since Dave’s 2020 diagnosis).
That is awful. With my brother I thought it was so demonstrative of how he was feeling. I don’t know if it’s happened to him again.
It is. Mine first happened when I was coming to terms with leaving academia, feeling powerless and out of control. There’s a lot of new research the past 20 years or so on physiological responses to stress. It’s so very complex.
What a beautiful ring and wonderful memory to share with your boys.
I had Dana’s Goldsmithing create a custom ring for me from my engagement and wedding rings and my mom’s eternity ring when she passed away. I love it and it is something I will always treasure. Our 9 month old granddaughter is always touching it ❤️
They do extraordinary work, don’t they? I feel fortunate that my neighbour’s recommended them. And yes, it’s a lovely memory to share with my boys as well.
What a beautiful story. Thank you for sharing. I'm going to investigate this with the jewelry I have my grandmother and mother. ( I sold my wedding and engagement ring after my horric divorce and that felt good).
It's a wonderful process (as well as end result) - I highly recommend it! I love how it feels too - like I'm honouring what we had, but also acknowledging that our marriage ended in his death. I wouldn't want to wear stones I associated with a horrific divorce anymore than I'd want to wear stones that were mined unethically. I agree, much better to sell them.
Thank you for sharing your story 💛
I love this story! Thanks so much for sharing the link in our chat.
Thanks Sarah!
What a moving story. I love the care and thoughtfulness you put into choosing your new ring. And to include your children in it makes it all the more special. Also, I LOVE both those shows too!
Thanks Lisa! It does feel so special to wear. I’m a little sad that both series are done for the season, but I certainly enjoyed them while they lasted!