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Mo__'s avatar

Celia, such a poignant message… I’ve moved into this thought space as an American, post Nov 5th. Appreciate your sharing the personal side. Solidarity for women, TY for your post

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Celia Cain, PhD's avatar

Thanks so much Mo! As the widow of a refugee, and an American and immigrant to Canada, I’ve been considering these issues for awhile. Looking back at what I said to him about his own country’s elections, I’m amazed my American naivety survived so long.

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Cynthia Cheng Mintz's avatar

Did your son explain to the teacher what he meant? Was there a written or oral aspect to the assignment where the student could defend the work? I get that middle school isn’t university or grad school but still…..

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Celia Cain, PhD's avatar

There was a written component and he spoke to her afterwards….

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Celia Cain, PhD's avatar

He did, and he explained that his father came to Canada as a political refugee and had told him what he brought. But she had a set idea of what refugeeing looked like and wasn’t interested in another perspective. It was really frustrating to me, but even at that time I knew enough to leave it to him to deal with his teacher himself - that my American style mama bearness would make things much worse!

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Cynthia Cheng Mintz's avatar

I think American Mama Bear is nothing compared to the stereotypical Asian Tiger Mom. At least you’ll speak with the teacher and protect your child. Asian Tiger Mom? It’s the kid’s fault!!!!!!

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Celia Cain, PhD's avatar

Oh yeah, I’m definitely white Texan-American about it. I didn’t realize how much until I was at a group meeting and was the only white mother. My boys’ teachers need to understand just how fortunate they are to have them. My boys have learned to handle things on their own so I don’t intervene with that attitude. Even when I’m Canadian polite and deferential, teachers pick up on my energy.

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Cynthia Cheng Mintz's avatar

And they should be thankful! Other kids of immigrant parents have a lot of family trauma to deal with just with the demanding parents! Especially those who “don’t believe” in neurodivergence. 🙄

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